Feedback is information from our environment about how it is responding to us. It is sound and current data that is available to us at all times though we are often paying insufficient attention to notice it. Feedback allows us to evaluate how well the impact of our behavior is congruent with our intentions. The more we can fine-tune our behavior to be in sync with our intentions the greater will be our effectiveness as managers of change.

People often attempt to use feedback as a direct means of changing someone's behavior. In fact, it is not very good at that. Feedback offered from that intention is often heard as criticism which, as often as not, generates defensiveness and resistance rather than the desired change. Corollarily, when someone says to you, "May I give you some feedback?" Duck!

As important as feedback is, managing it effectively calls for understanding two principles:

A. Feedback always says something about the giver, not necessarily anything about the receiver. Consequently, let your initial response be curiosity about what's going on with the giver, then decide what your next course of action might be.

B. What is done with feedback is solely in the hands of the receiver. Consequently , be curious about why you are choosing to react the way you are, then choose a response that might more effectively get you what you want.

Kurt Lewin offered the formula: behavior is a function of people in an environment . Too often we manage our behavior solely on data from our internal belief systems. Effective change management calls for paying close attention to the feedback from our environment (including of course the people in it) so that we can adjust our behavior to get the response we wish from those around us.